Gifts of Imperfection

Brene Brown

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She could never go back and make some of the details pretty. All she could do was move forward and make the whole beautiful.
— Terri St. Cloud
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Worthy Now

A deep sense of love and belonging is an irreducible need of all women, men and children.

LOVE

We cultivate love when we allow our most vulnerable and powerful selves to be deeply seen and known.

Love is not something we give or get; it is something we nurture and grow, a connection that can only be cultivated between two people when it exists within each one of them -- we can only love others as much as we love ourselves.

BELONGING

Belonging is the innate human desire to be part of something larger than us. Because this yearning is so primal, we often try to acquire it by fitting in and by seeking approval...which are not only hollow substitutes for belonging, but often barriers to it. Because true belonging only happens when we present our authentic, imperfect selves to the world -- our sense of belonging can never be greater than our sense of self-acceptance.

 
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Please. Perform. Perfect.


Perfectionism is not the same thing as striving to be your best. Perfectionism is not about healthy achievement and growth. Perfectionism is the belief that if we live perfect, look perfect and act perfect, we can minimize or avoid the pain of blame, judgement and shame. It's a shield. Perfectionism is a twenty-ton shield that we lug around thinking that it will protect us when, in fact, it's the one thing that's really preventing us from taking flight.

Perfectionism is, at its core, about trying to earn approval and acceptance. Somewhere along the way we adopt this dangerous and debilitating belief system: I am what I accomplish and how well I accomplish it. Please. Perform. Perfect. Healthy striving is self-focused--how can I improve? Perfectionism is others-focused--what will they think?

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Perfectionism is self-destructive simply because there is no such thing as perfect.

Feeling shamed, judged and blamed are realities of the human experience. Perfectionism actually increases the odds that we'll experience these painful emotions and often leads to self=blame: It's my fault. I'm feeling this way because "I'm not good enough."

#goodenough #perfectdoesnotexist #perfectlyimperfection #ownyou #onlylove

 
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More to come …

Shame

joy

Resiliency

The dark does not destroy the light; it defines it. It's our fear of the dark that casts our joy into the shadows.

 
Let go of exhaustion as a status symbol and productivity as self worth.
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Buddha’s Brain

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The Subtle Art